Reviving the Vibes

What are you supposed to feel when an event that you have been planning and working hard on for over a year finally concludes? A sense of relief, knowing that all the hard work and meticulous planning have paid off, or a sense of emptiness or loss, as something that has been a significant part of your life and routine is now over? I know it's natural to experience a mix of emotions, and I am trying to figure out what it is.

I never actually planned to study engineering. I had joined for a BSc course even though I got a reasonable rank in the entrance exam. But fate had other ideas. I was lured to join B.Arch., which at that time was only offered at REC and CET. I agreed because architecture is something I have always loved (and still do). So, I took a TC from Vimala College to join REC Calicut. However, during the joining process, when my mom learned that B.Arch. at REC didn't have accreditation at that time, she vetoed the offer and made me take EEE instead. This change was kind of a last-minute decision. But once we returned home, I guess when she started thinking about it, she began worrying - ragging, electrical labs, hostel life, distance, and so many other "issues," and she forced me to shift to GECT. To cut the long story short, I gave my parents an authorization letter and said, "Do whatever you want." That's how I got a second TC from REC Calicut and ended up at GEC Thrissur, which was hardly a kilometer from my home.  They had also joined me in Electronics, which was trending but a subject I always hated. Until then, I used to study the subjects I enjoyed and scored well, but once I joined engineering, I did reasonably well only in the first semester, which didn't have many electronics subjects. After that, my grades started slipping. All I did was open the book for the first time the day before exams and read whatever I could until the exam started. It was a time of feeling a bit lost, frustrated, and uncertain. Our class was away from the main building, and being day scholars, all we did was get off at the Vimala stop, climb over the wall to reach the ADS classrooms. The moment there was any strike or free class, we did the same climbing and scooted at the first instance. I frequented the Vimala College canteen more than the GEC canteen. So during my college days, I hardly knew anyone, not even my own classmates, let alone batchmates. Probably that was the reason I never connected or felt like visiting the college after I graduated.

In fact, it was during our time in Bangalore that I connected with most of my own classmates and some other batchmates and developed friendships. When the discussion about our 25th-year reunion first came up in our class group during the Covid lockdown, we were only thinking about an ECE get-together and nothing beyond that. As part of that, we had planned some giving-back ideas and had contacted the department as well. So when Sanjeev contacted me to volunteer to collect the contact info of my classmates for a common group get-together, I was quite passive. But I took it up as it was a fairly easy task since we already had a class WhatsApp group where most contacts were readily available, except for two people who are still elusive :( After a couple of months, he formed the SPOCs group and invited me to join, which I was quite resistant to. Even though I used to be active in cultural clubs and NGOs during my early days in Bangalore, I had totally withdrawn from all such activities after the passing of my parents. Probably the only event I planned and executed after that was my own wedding!

I tried to pass the responsibility to almost everyone in my class, but no one was ready to take it up, and that's how I ended up in the SPOCs group. We were a group of mismatched individuals, many of whom had never met before. Initially, we had a lot of discussions and many active members. But as days and months passed, most people got busy with life, and the active members were reduced to just a few.  Even then, we had a dedicated lot who took responsibility and executed it to perfection. We worked and coordinated from different countries and cities, yet managed to stick together for close to a year without any major incidents, which is a great achievement in itself. I never thought I would make new friends at this age, especially from GEC, and I think that is what happened. I got to know a bunch of pure, selfless souls who radiated positive energy, and who I can now happily call friends—the ones I missed meeting during the college days.

Now that the event is over this weekend, everyone seems to be on a high—not just the SPOCs, but also the batchmates, the faculty, and the invitees. We are receiving compliments that the event was planned and executed so well. Even the college authorities and the alumni association are quite happy, as we are the first batch to have given the highest contribution back so far. That's when I started wondering what it is that I am feeling. Is it a sense of nostalgia and a desire to recapture something valuable from the past?  The event was named "ReVibes" which evokes feelings, moods, and atmospheres that are intangible but deeply felt, making the idea of reviving them particularly appealing. Maybe it's also a time for my own rejuvenation and return to a more vibrant, energetic state. Hopefully...